DESTRUCTIVE ELEMENTS

“Set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith, and in purity” (I Timothy4:12)

Greetings to you on behalf of the family of Shalom Family Enrichment Mission. May the good LORD bless you and your family, and hold your hand and lead you throughout this month. Few things glorify God more than living together in a spirit of unity according to the teachings of His Word. And few things are more destructive than not doing so! To be effective in our lives and in our home and in our society, we must live out our Savior Jesus Christ’s love for one another. But, of course, this is a challenge in our Christian walk. That is why Paul, writing to Colossians says in 3:12, “Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness and patience”. He loves us so much that He has chosen us to be His and He has the confidence that we could lead a holy life and be His beloved. For a holy life, we should be clothed with these five attributes, compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. If we could develop these characters in our life, then according to verse 13, we could bear with one another, forgive one another – whatever the grievances we may have.

But now I want to share with you three destructive behaviors that can devastate our Christian life, our family and bring dishonor to God. There are many others but these three are the most damaging behaviors which peep in without our knowledge.

1. COMPARING.

Luke 18:11→ “The Pharisee stood up and prayed about himself: God I thank you that I am not like other men, …….. or even like this tax collector” Comparing ourselves with other can be destructive to our family whether we see them as better than us or worse than us. I have come across couple saying; “He/she is from such and such church and so is not spiritual” Comparison leads to pride. Sometimes we talk ill of people who are still in sin. We even address them projecting their sin….”O that drunkard!” But would Jesus say that word. He had compassion on such people and even said that He came for such people and shed His Blood for them! I have come across men saying, “She is not educated like me” or “There family is not like our family” Are you comparing? Some fathers used to say, “My daughter earns more than her husband!” Never compare with anybody because that will lead to destruction. Without your knowledge it will explode one day and then it will be too late to rectify!

2. JUDGING

Mathew 7:1-2 reads: “Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you”

There are times when we must make judgments about behavior that is clearly sinful. But the kind of judging that is destructive involves judging others’ motives, actions, attitudes, and personality issues that are sinful. We find fault with everything that does not come up to our personal standard and expectations. Whenever I read the portion about the woman who was caught red handed in adultery and brought to Jesus, I used to feel that I would have definitely joined the teachers of the law and Pharisees and blamed her. But my Jesus, how He looked at the woman –  What a compassion! Brothers, Sisters let us walk in His steps. Let us not judge anybody but pray for such people who need our prayers! When we pass judgment on others, we are condemning ourselves. Therefore let us stop passing judgment on others, especially in our families. If you have the love of Jesus in your heart, you will never judge others.

3. SLANDER AND GOSSIP

Slander and gossip are two sides of the same coin. Actually, comparing is followed by judging which in turn is followed by slander and gossip. We can even say they are chain reactions which ultimately kill a family, a society, or a fellowship. Strong Christian organizations collapse due to these. Slander is lying about others. Webster defines slander as “An utterance of false charges or misrepresentations which defame and damage another’s reputation”

In Mathew 15:19 we read, “For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander” Slander is equated with murder, adultery, theft! Let us be careful, Brothers and Sisters! Mother-in-law slanders about daughter-in-law and vice versa! It is murder, it is adultery, it is theft! Let us be careful. Slanderers are filled with every kind of wickedness, evil and depravity. While writing to Titus Paul says in 3:1-2, “Remind the people…… to slander no one, to be peaceable and considerate, and to show true humility toward all men” and Peter writes in his First Epistle, 2:1, “Therefore rid yourselves of all malice and all deceit, hypocrisy, envy and slander of every kind”

Slander and gossip are linked together. Gossip destroys relationships. Grumbling against others is also a form of gossip.  It can split close friends, a family, and a couple! It is a powerful weapon of satan to shatter the peace and harmony in a fellowship.

At the same time we must be very cautious about gossipers because listening to gossip is as wrong as gossiping yourself. People like to listen to gossips. When somebody talks ill about others, other families, it is sweet to hear! But be careful! God hates it! Listening to gossip is deliciously tempting, but affects us very deeply as we listen. There are trained gossipers, especially in churches, holding top posts in church administration. About such people Paul cautions, “Have nothing to do with godless myths – profane and impure and godless fictions – old wives’ tales [mere grandmother’s tales – and silly myths, and express your disapproval of them. Train yourself toward godliness”

Let us diligently live out God’s Word in our families and bring glory to Him not only through our work but through how we relate to one another.

Let us pray “Our heavenly Father give us the grace to shun evil, especially, these three destructive forces so that we may have peace and harmony in our families and society around us. In Jesus’ Name we pray. Amen”